Friendships: Toxic Positivity versus Real Support

We encounter so many people in our lives.
Some at school, some at college, some at adulthood and even old age.

Yet at all stages, we possess the common tendency to question:
Is this person a genuine friend? Or am I only friends with them because I see them every day?

It's quite natural to ask these questions. But the difficulty lies in gaining the answers to them.
In an increasingly fast-paced world full of fake people, how do we distinguish the real ones?

This blog is not a one-shot checklist to figure out who's the "real one" or "OG Gang". It's a blog to help you recognise the kind of relationship you hold with so many different people in your life and whether your environment is actually as positive as you perceive it to be. 

And no matter the outcome, remember, talking it out always helps. Make conversation. Don't ghost or run away.

Okay enough introduction, let's get to it!

Simply put, the cliched lines you every day in a WhatsApp good morning message = Toxic positivity.
"Good vibes only!"

"Just stop being sad, look at all the better things you have"

"You'll get over it"

You and I both know for a fact that saying these have never proved effective. They're just "upar upar ke baate" (floating talks) that people say to avoid having difficult conversations. However, in friendships they can look something like:
"Oh, you got 82? I'm so happy for you"(in a sarcastic tone)

"Good for you"

These don't sound good to the ear and quite frankly you wouldn't want to be on the receiving end of it either.

Genuine support would look something like:
"Oh, you got 82? That's amazing! It's such a huge jump from last time lessgoooo"

It's supportive. It makes the other person happy. The other person thinks about the whole day.

Real support is being there for the other times in not only the fun parts but also rough days. It's acknowledging the other person's feelings and letting them know that even though you may not be able to fully experience the pain or their feelings, you're there for them. You're there to hear them out. You're there with them emotionally - by their side.

Everyone has bad days and it's normal. 
How we approach it or help someone get through it is what matters at the end of the day.

We've all self -flagilated at some point or the other. We may have said a few cliched lines here and there and it's okay. 
You don't have to be a supportive shoulder for every single person in the world. Just make sure the ones you hold dear to your heart are never spoken to in a toxic way by you in the future. And that includes you. First change the way you speak to yourself and then to the world.

Worse comes to worse, just say #slay and move on.

(I'm kidding please don't do this unless it's the end of a conversation and you want to fill it with a hint of humour)

That was it for today! I really hope you enjoyed reading it as I did writing it!
Don't forget to share and comment for more content, every Friday!

Signing off,

Kuhu :)